Robin Looks Extremely Gay Here....

Is it me, or does that guy look like Penn & Teller? (Yes, I realize that Penn & Teller are two separate people, but I just always get confused as to which one is which)


[source]

An FB Conversation

My friend Molly and I have a serious problem. We sometimes do this thing where we find random people we went to high school with and judge them based on their current life choices. Recently, we came across the fact that one of our former classmates had changed their last name on the FB and their picture was a wedding photo. HOWEVER, the kicker was that Molly went to this girl's wedding a couple years ago TO A DIFFERENT GUY. NOT THE GUY IN THE PICTURE, AND NOT THE LAST NAME SHE NOW HAS. We had to investigate.

We couldn't come up with too much information, because she managed to de-friend us somehow (why on earth would she do that?!), so we decided to put our creative skills to the test. Here's a recent conversation we had about this possible divorce mystery.

Traci:
wow i'm impressed with your research skills, dougherty. let's make up their story until we have the facts.

"Butterball, being a young and naive freshman at Freedom College, met Barb and her husband at a mixer (bible study) on campus in fall of 2007. the three soon became friends, and would reenact scenes from LOtR on the weekends. One night, whilst Mr. St. Cloud was away at ComicCon, Barb and Butterball brushed hands during a routine light saber fight. Their eyes met and they continued to stare into each others' eyes lustfully, until Mr. St. Cloud came home early from ComicCon. Wearing a Captain America costume, Mr. St. Cloud caught Barb and Butterball making lusty eyes at each other and declared divorce upon Barb (kinda like michael scott in this scene http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HuGIgf-ICHM). Barb ran after Mr. St. Cloud and tugged at his cape, begging him to not go. But alas, just like Captain America, Mr. St. Cloud disappeared forever, leaving Barb to commiserate in the arms of Butterball. The rest is history

Molly:

HAHAH! literally laughing out loud! LotR! ComiCon!
And making up a story until you have the facts is actually exactly what lawyers do. F'real.
So, according to FB Mr. Butterball went to HS in Canada. With that in mind, may I present my theory:

With RenFaire season in full swing, Mr. St. Cloud was working overtime in his smelting workshop, the sweat dripping from his brow to his rustic, burlap tunic. It isn't just that this was a big season for medieval-style swords and armor (though it was). Blinded by love, nose weakened by allergies, Mr. St. Cloud had not realized exactly who, or what, he was marrying. Now, he had grown disillusioned. Plaque grew heavy on Barb's gapped, snagly chiclet teeth. Her frizzy curls appeared wet with grease. Cystic acne covered her face, arms, and back. She smelled. St. Cloud dreaded his home life.

In the absence of her husband, Barb became ever-more involved in online roleplaying games. She spent all day looking forward to her chats and warcraft maneuvers with Butterball, a Canadian high school student. St. Cloud knew that, in the eyes of God, he was bound for life. So, he set to ironworking a renaissance style cross for the St. Cloud home. On their anniversary, St. C came home with his gift.

He was shocked to see Barb rocking in the fetal position, wrapped in a Canadian flag, watching Degrassi and rolling an eight-sided die. She would not even respond to St. Cloud. The wedding march blared from Barb's computer. On the monitor stood her WoW persona, Maiden Barb Fuzzybrow, at the altar with Butterballwyn the Brave! "Why can't it be real?" She cried.

St. Cloud threw down the iron cross, tears mingling with his own greasy hair and acne face. Within weeks, Barb was betrothed in both real AND virtual life. Cookie cakes abounded.

St. Cloud cannot hear "O Canada" without flying into a rage.

We're going to hell.

*Any resemblance to real or fictitious names, identities, characters, persons, whether living or dead is purely coincidental and unintentional*